Victoria Monét on Dating Women: ‘They Did Me Dirty’

Singer-songwriter Victoria Monét, known for her smooth vocals and heartfelt lyrics, recently sat down with Angie Martinez on the “IRL” podcast and got real about her experiences dating women. Her take? It’s been a bit rough, even describing women as “a little bit worse” than men in the dating arena.

When ‘Girls Do You Dirty’

Monét, who is bisexual, shared that she often finds women approach her more for her attractiveness or physical attributes rather than seeking a serious connection. “The girls did me dirty,” she admitted, explaining that the approaches she receives tend to be more sensual than serious. She expressed a desire for something deeper, a genuine relationship, which she feels has been lacking in her experiences with women.

She elaborated, noting that many women seem to focus on her beauty or body, rather than seeing her as someone to build a serious relationship with. This lack of serious romantic interest has left her feeling a bit disillusioned.

Seeking a Different Energy

Reflecting on her ideal partner, Monét mentioned that she’s been feeling very feminine lately and is open to a more masculine energy. This could mean a masculine-presenting woman, something she hasn’t explored before, as her past relationships have been with women who were more femme.

Interestingly, she also touched upon the idea of a future relationship with a man, indicating an openness to exploring different dynamics as she moves forward. This suggests a thoughtful approach to her personal life, considering various possibilities for connection and partnership.

Community Reactions and Past Relationships

The conversation sparked reactions in the comments, with many sharing their own experiences. Some agreed that dating women can be intense, while others felt relationship struggles are universal across genders. One user poignantly noted, “It’s just all people Pookie. We’re in integrity famine.”

This candid discussion comes after Monét’s public split from her longtime partner, John Gaines, in September 2024. The couple, who share a daughter named Hazel born in 2021, had been separated for 10 months before announcing their breakup. They released a joint statement emphasizing their need for healing and transparency.